Hi, I’d like to introduce you to the lovely Kate Davies of Your Fertility Journey. If you read my Facebook page, you might remember that Kate and myself swapped a week’s worth of posting for each other. As these were so successful, and a real crowd pleaser, we decided to write some guest blogs for each other too. So here is Kate with some excellent coaching tips, please feel free to engage and comment! Andrea xx
Kate’s Guest Blog – Fertility Coaching Tips
Going through fertility investigations and treatments is possibly one of the most challenging and difficult life events you will ever experience as a couple. If you are currently navigating your way along your own turbulent fertility journey, I suspect at times you feel all at sea. You may feel isolated and alone and desperate to have someone to confide in.
Many women are turning to Fertility Coaching to help plug that gap and to facilitate bringing about a renewed sense of possibility and purpose into their lives that are currently dominated by the exhausting trial of trying to conceive.
I love Fertility Coaching and let me tell you why………….
Fertility coaching helps you to gain some sense of control over the process that is happening to you. Let’s face it, you can’t control the treatment or the rigorous schedule you have to endure, however you absolutely can control how you cope with it! Fertility coaching not only gives you that someone to talk to and to support you but it also equips you with fabulous practical tools and techniques to help change your mind-set from one of negativity to positivity. Research clearly shows that women with a positive mind-set have greater IVF success than women who feel very negative and worn down by their journey.
Here are a few tips to get you started. Have a go with these and see if this helps you to feel more positive and less stressed.
- Keep a Fertility Journal
My clients find this a fabulous way of ordering their thoughts and making sense of how they feel. This is your private record of your hopes and dreams and when you need to – your darkest thoughts. Often the simple act of writing down the swirling thoughts in your mind gives you the feeling of letting go and releases the obsessive power that these thoughts have over us. Try and write every day. Some of my clients prefer to write in the morning to clear their mind before the day ahead or you may prefer to get your thoughts on paper at night before going to sleep.
- Start a Gratitude List
You might read this and think ‘But I have nothing to feel grateful for right now’. Those thoughts are totally understandable however it is a good exercise to acknowledge all the good things in your life right now. An easy way of doing this is to write 3 things you are grateful for in your journal every day. It could be things like ‘I have a wonderful supportive partner’ or something as simple as ‘Today I am grateful that the sun is shining’. You’ll be amazed at how powerful this exercise is and how it helps you to feel more positive.
- The 3 Question Technique
Whenever you have a negative thought – challenge it. Consider whether
a) Is this thought really true?
b) Is it helpful to me?
c) Is it helpful to anyone else?
If the answer is no to all of these, let go of that thought and replace it with a more positive one.
- Find Yourself a Mantra
I use this all the time and encourage my clients to do so. Find yourself a saying or mantra that helps you to get through the difficult days. My favourite ones are ‘It will be ok in the end and if it’s not ok yet, it’s because I’ve not reached the end’ and ‘Let go of what you can’t control’. Try these or come up with a meaningful statement of your own. Put it on a post it note and stick it on your mirror so you can be reminded of it every morning and say it to yourself when you feel your worry and anxiety increasing. It works wonders!
These are just 4 Fertility Coaching tools that you might find useful. There are so many more…………………………….
Hope you have found my blog for Andrea useful, thank you for reading.
Kate Davies RN Bsc(Hons) is a Fertility Practitoner and Fertility Coach. Kate has a private practice in the South of England and consults and coaches women from all over the UK via Skype. You can find out more about Kate and the services she provides by visiting –
And on Facebook at
https://www.facebook.com/yourfertilitycoaching?ref=hl – Coaching practice
https://www.facebook.com/YourFertilityJourney?ref=hl – Fertility Consultation